March 31, 2009

Gautam’s 18th Birthday

If Gautam Gambhir became a born again cricketer on the 4th day, then on the 5th he came of age many times over. In the space of two days he attained in cricket years, the equivalent of a player with voting rights – for heaven’s sake, after his innings, he can run for elections. And in this Indian team that counts for plenty.

Gambhir is now a test, ODI and T20 staple; regular test and T20 opener, but he still doesn’t open the innings in one-dayers, at least not when SRT decides to play. The day Sachin abdicates the opening slot for Gambhir should not be far. That’s if Sachin calls it right.

In the blink of an eye, Gambhir has scored so many runs, in so many formats, it’s confusing to tell where he got what.

When it started with the IPL hungama, I dismissed the tiny Kotla ground. When the tap ran in ODIs, I wrote them off as white ball freebees. When the run-dam broke in tests, I said sub continent.

By then, even if I doubted Gambhir’s mettle, I had started to enjoy his quirks, like that jaunt down the track. Here was a down the track walker not a wanker. And he walked, and he elbowed, and he gave as he got, and there was joy on top of the order, like there never was –

Or there was in another lifetime, in Sunny’s days with Chauhan. But that was some blurred memory, this was live cricket.

And still, for the life of me, I could not believe, that Indian cricket, in spite of its vision, was myopic when it came to the ODI opening slot.

Frankly, for me nothing, repeat nothing, supersedes the openers. They are where it begins, and quite often can end. They are the reason middle orders make bowlers bleed. So, when India decided to partner Sehwag with Sachin, and not Gambhir, I feared the worst.

After all, wasn’t Gambhir, even in Greg Chappell’s time, labelled as fragile and soft?

Yet when he acquitted himself in an ODI at no. 3, I was pleasantly surprised. But then returned the trickiness outside-off, a random demotion in the batting order and an assortment of cricketing speed-breakers.

It was baffling to see them break the Sehwag-Gambhir love affair – how could they not see what so blatantly obvious. Yet it was equally baffling to see Gambhir battle on, hour after hour after hour in Napier. At some point it, as he smothered another Vettori delivery into the earth, it looked like he’d merge with the pitch, some new installation art.

He was one with the cricket universe of Napier, he was in McLean Park, and McLean Park was in him.

Gautam Gambhir, on 29th & 30th March, made love to the game, and allowed the game to make love to him.

It will in all likelihood be his most unforgettable cricketing romance.

March 28, 2009

Clout.

Hamilton, 1st test, India’s 2nd innings, Virender Sehwag did not open the batting with Gautam Gambhir; Rahul Dravid did. The test was all but won yet Sehwag stayed back. Why?

My take is India was, for a change, thinking beyond the popular vote back home, keen to wrap a 10-wicket test win, but not lose Sehwag cheap to one of his illustrious indiscretions.

At that point, the team mgt disregarded Dravid’s terrible slump, and sent him marching to the centre – had he failed, the first innings’ fifty would’ve been diluted somewhat. Instead he got a not out, there to score some winning runs again.

Napier, 2nd test, India’s 2nd innings, Sehwag opens with Gambhir. In the 1st test, Dhoni was captain, here, Sehwag is skipper.

Had Dravid opened here, it would be after scores of 66, 8*(first test) and 83 (2nd test, 1st innings)

Compare this to Sehwag’s 24 (1st test) and 34 (2nd test)

Not just that look at the time spent in the centre: Dravid -500 minutes, that’s more than 8 hours.

Compare that to Sehwag – 80 minutes.

Also factor the balls faced by the two players: Dravid – 358 deliveries

Compare that to Sehwag - 46 deliveries

However, Sehwag opened in the 2nd test, 2nd innings – scored 22 of 21 balls in 42 minutes. (in this series, an average Sehwag innings lasts 40 minutes)

Dravid, now at the crease, has scored 11 of 33 balls in approx 30-40 minutes.

I believe, before a batsman walks on to the field, he does have a grasp on how exactly he feels about his batting.

With Sehwag here, it’s tough to tell. He had either negated the first innings shot totally, on a no-remorse trip, and to hell with all the Kiwis, I’m gonna blast them to bits.

Or, I am the captain, I must lead by example, if I do not open I will set a bad example.

Or, neither Kirsten nor MSD have suggested Dravid as opener, how can I?

Either way, Sehwag wasn’t feeling too good about himself.

Sehwag alone knows why he opened, seeing the mood he was in, he deserved to be in the nets, diffusing some of that nervous energy, slamming Balaji’s slower ones into the Pacific.

Finally, I think, it comes down to clout. MSD has it, and as captain he will make some unpopular decisions. Times it might even help Sehwag amongst others.

Sehwag though, is yet to learn how to manipulate his success. And maybe he’s just too nice a guy to ask Dravid to open instead of him.

Tomorrow on the 4th day, on the back of over 110 overs, you can expect the two spinners, Vettori and Patel to bowl a lion’s share of the overs.

That’s when India will miss its counter attacking trump.

Instead, he'll be branded as just another joker.

March 23, 2009

my cricket cocoon!


sketch by jo, age 3

Our lives are small, insignificant, cocooned in cricket
Our lives are big, significant, liberated in cricket
I live by myself in a drain pipe in a cricket cocoon
I live with millions on a field in a cricket cocoon
I live in a cricket cocoon
I live by myself in a cricket cocoon
I live with you in a cricket cocoon
Don’t take my cricket away from me
Don’t take her away from me
I don’t got much else except for her
She don’t got much else except for me
She is my cricket cocoon
I am her cricket cocoon

I cannot see your point of view
I do not see your point of view
There is no other point of view
There is no other point of view

I cry every time I cannot bat
I cry every time I have to give them my bat
I am six years and seven months old
And they take away my bat
I will not play with them
I live in my cricket cocoon

I live all alone by myself and my dreams
They are bigger than your biggest mansion
They are bigger than your biggest spaceship
I do not want to wake up
Just let me be in my cricket cocoon
Just let me be

March 22, 2009

Raped by numbers.

Chris Gayle’s screwy stoned look will haunt me for a long time.

Never mind that the Windies lost a match thanks to the Dyson Lewd method.

It was Gayle who had the bummer trip.

His head whirled, twirled, he saw all them D/L score-sheet numbers collide with each other.

Oh maan, like burning fire in his soul.

Had Bob Marley been alive, he would have done a rendition of “No woman, No cry” for Gayle.

Aptly sung as “No man, No cry”

Gayle sat there, sprawled, legs apart in limbo, as if each one of those D/L equations were taking him, one after the other.

But Gayle didn’t move, Gayle didn’t cry.

He just sat there, as the world went by.

And then an age past by him, and the Poms were in for the salt-on-the-open wounds shake-hand.

It was remarkable that Gayle moved.

Even more remarkable that he stood up, almost half expected him to crumble to dust.

And then they shook his hands, but ask the Englishman and they will tell you:

It was like shaking a dead man’s hand.

So when Gayle later said that he won’t Kill Dyson, you had to believe him.

That was not anger he felt, just a deep pain at being raped by numbers.




Btw here's RS' feed on how to tweak the D/L method

March 21, 2009

This Win.

This win
Can feel it my stride
This win
Can feel it as i glide
This win
Can feel it my hide
This win
Can feel it my bones
This win
Can feel it my grip
This win
Can feel it my words
This win
Can feel it my groove
This win
Can feel it right now
This win
It just hit me
Again
This win
It feels different
When you’re rested and awake
This win
I can see you clear

This win
Was a long time coming
But did it come
But did it come
But did it come
Come at the right time
Coming!

This win
In quaint little Cow town
This win
In a quaint little drawing room
This win
Against a quaint little team
This win
Against a guy called Guptill
This win
Against a Ryder called Jesse
This win
Against an Irishman who foresees his losses
This win
Against Vettori’s choirboys
This win
In the Land of the long white cloud

This win
How good is this win?
If it weren’t stacked up
Against history
This win
Needs two more
In two weeks
This win
Can’t get enough
This win
Should not be enough.

Like to see the New look in New Zealand at BCC!

March 20, 2009

Munaf Patel Ki

There are players in the Indian team from the boondocks.

And then there is Munaf Patel. He comes from beyond the boondocks.

Munaf Patel’s selection for the first test was a debatable one after his brain freeze in the last ODI.

Munaf smiled, like he’d sneaked into his first strip bar as a young teen, only, it was his bowling being stripped, ball after ball.

First test, for the third seamer was a tossup between Balaji, Kulkarni and Munaf.

Munaf was tossed in, and he found himself bowling a hat-trick ball, and then prising Mills out on the day’s last ball.

After last ball heroics, it’s impossible not to lead your team off the park, at least in spirit.

Ask, what’s his name, that guy from Delhi, who plays for Haryana, legspinner, er..the guy who got Michael Clarke’s wicket, lemme check on cric…aah yeah, Amit Mishra (serious, I really forgot his name)

Anyway, Mishra and Munaf are the ones you forget.

They’re not the poster boys, not the type you’ll hand a Pepsi, or even a mineral water ad contract.

They can however wangle a good IPL deal.

Get stuff that comes by on sheer performance.

Their bad days will always be amplified more, they will always be under one of those hi-tech flatbed scanners.

Their better days, however, will be glossed over.

Face it they are not the guys you want to see on the sports page.

Not when Sachin shines on the same day.

That is the bane of being Munaf Patel.

Yet Munaf can surprise you – with his bowling, and at times even with his batting.

That ugly sweep off Vettori for four today, that’s one of the days shots that stayed with me.

Then his throw in from the boundary, there was a lotta arm in that, and it wasn’t underarm or relay either.

The crazy wide eyes smile was there too.

Someone is working on Munaf Patel.

And it helps he speaks the same language as a lotta the cool dudes.

Nothing quite like down and dirty Hindi swear words to unite cricketers.

Teri Ma Ki!


For Munaf Patel's Sketchy Job Profile, visit Bored Cricket Crazy Indians (BCC!)

March 19, 2009

Still.

Still.

There’s Rahul Dravid.

Still.

Posing for a portrait.

Still.

Deep in thought.

Still.

The monk who sold his fears.

Still.

3 seconds.

Still.

7 seconds.

Still.

11 seconds.

Still.

The Wall.

Still.

Apt.

Still.

Telecast freeze.

Still.

So what.




Still more POVs on the Ind-NZL series? Go here.

March 11, 2009

Indian Women's World Cup Training

A romantic new way to improve 'Running between the wickets'

Bollywood Style.



March 05, 2009

I see my cricketing life (shine before my eyes)

There has got to be a reason
For that one helluva season
There has got to be a reason
Why I served in the army
Why I cannot let them harm me

And I'm flat out in this bus
And I’m laughing to myself
What will you bowl now, Splendid Mendis?
And I’m laughing to myself
What will you bowl now, Splendid Mendis?
I see my cricketing life
Shine before my eyes
And I see
What I will bowl now, Splendid Mendis.

March 01, 2009

Sachin Tendulkar at Madame Tussauds.




related story+video


High on Chanderpaul

It's not as if you or I were given out
It was Shivnarine Chanderpaul given out
Not once but twice given out
Not once but twice given out

Checked in for bed & breakfast
Loads of runs, bangers and mash
Scoring runs like a rash
And still he wouldn’t get that Stanford cash!

The finger went up
He stood there holding his empty cup
And then the referral
And then the referral

It pulled the plate right before his eyes
Hungry he was and it hit him high
But these umpires and their crooked lies
Why don’t they get outta here, go bake some pies

Already invested in a bad plan
Lost a million before he won it
A lone man, not part of a clan
Lost a million before he won it

High on Chanderpaul we was
High on Chanderpaul the ball was
High handed on Chanderpaul the umpire was
High handed on Chanderpaul the third umpire was.

3rd umpire's visual evidence for Chanderpaul's Dismissal