I’ve been a fool
I played too much
I even played with a crutch
I’ve been a fool
A real big fool
I may not play again
Oh Ho! It feels so bad
But in a way I’m kinda glad
There will be no more farewells
There will be no more stairwells
I’ll just take the easy way out
Hop on the escalator
Jump into the elevator
But what use is that
I want to play again
I really do
I might sound confused
But that’s ‘cause I am
Oh Ho! It feels so bad
I may not play again
Not at the highest level
At least I can go out and revel
In the I P L
Four overs I can bowl
It’s not like walking on coal
MSD is a cool guy
I’m gonna bring him a big fat pie
Oh ho! I feel kinda better now
We won the Ashes and I was there
Not in full but with a tear
Still I was an inspiration
Now am gonna get me a drink
A big lad like me gets thirsty
Oh Ho! At least I’m gonna drink again!
August 31, 2009
August 28, 2009
I'm in talks with Salman Khan about his IPL team
Strongly recommend he uses the name of this blog for his IPL team.
August 27, 2009
Don’t leave a sinking ship, Ricky Ponting.
Leave it when it’s sunk. Your job is far from done. The day isn’t far when a minnow nation will beat you in a test match. Expect you to blame it on a few bad sessions.
Shakib looks more than likely to knock you out. He has a few handy spinners, bet you don’t even know their names. Do you know Shakib’s name – he’s the Bangladeshi captain, no it isn’t Ashraful anymore.
For the time being, stick as the one day captain, there’s a Champions Trophy in a few weeks. You are the world champions, fifty overs, that’s your scene.
Of course, Clarke beat the Pakis in the desert, you were on leave. Is the one-day break something you picked from Sachin? So you could concentrate on losing the Ashes.
Good, you’ve never been too keen on Twenty20. Though going by the roundabout explanation on split-captaincy options it was tough to tell who was saying what – or who was being made to say what?
You aren’t a very direct person. Have you started to speak in the third person?
Anyway, about the T20 tamasha, leave that to pup. And concentrate on the test record, that’s what Sachin is doing.
Shakib looks more than likely to knock you out. He has a few handy spinners, bet you don’t even know their names. Do you know Shakib’s name – he’s the Bangladeshi captain, no it isn’t Ashraful anymore.
For the time being, stick as the one day captain, there’s a Champions Trophy in a few weeks. You are the world champions, fifty overs, that’s your scene.
Of course, Clarke beat the Pakis in the desert, you were on leave. Is the one-day break something you picked from Sachin? So you could concentrate on losing the Ashes.
Good, you’ve never been too keen on Twenty20. Though going by the roundabout explanation on split-captaincy options it was tough to tell who was saying what – or who was being made to say what?
You aren’t a very direct person. Have you started to speak in the third person?
Anyway, about the T20 tamasha, leave that to pup. And concentrate on the test record, that’s what Sachin is doing.
August 25, 2009
The two Andrews: Strauss and Flintoff
When Andrew Strauss was appointed England’s test captain, Andrew Flintoff joked, something to the extent of, Strauss is the butt of change room jokes.
It may have reflected the gamesmanship between the players, but it wasn’t too flattering for England’s new captain.
Strauss, in classic Strauss fashion, did not react to this supposed innocent remark, as that’s just what it possibly was.
Lesser men may have made a mountain out of it. Like why are we even talking about it now?
It’s about timing. It’s about the economy of word, comment, in a flash world of IPL, Strauss is old style. Ballroom cricket almost.
He prefers, at the risk of using a corrupt cricketing phrase, his bat to do the talking. Trouble is, in today’s world, bats do not talk louder than words.
Why else would there be such a clamour for the man, nay the talisman, Andrew Flintoff.
While Andrew F is greater than the sum of his achievements, Andrew S is, and will always be in the shadow of his triumphs.
An IPL contract may never be his. The exaggerated limelight of an Ashes win, one like 2005, where Freddie and KP loomed large over the cricketing world, atop a double-decker, may never be his.
But I doubt that matters much to an everyday guy like Andrew Strauss. For one, his calm of manner makes him stand better on his two feet than float in fluff of clouds.
And here you go for a bored Ashes version
It may have reflected the gamesmanship between the players, but it wasn’t too flattering for England’s new captain.
Strauss, in classic Strauss fashion, did not react to this supposed innocent remark, as that’s just what it possibly was.
Lesser men may have made a mountain out of it. Like why are we even talking about it now?
It’s about timing. It’s about the economy of word, comment, in a flash world of IPL, Strauss is old style. Ballroom cricket almost.
He prefers, at the risk of using a corrupt cricketing phrase, his bat to do the talking. Trouble is, in today’s world, bats do not talk louder than words.
Why else would there be such a clamour for the man, nay the talisman, Andrew Flintoff.
While Andrew F is greater than the sum of his achievements, Andrew S is, and will always be in the shadow of his triumphs.
An IPL contract may never be his. The exaggerated limelight of an Ashes win, one like 2005, where Freddie and KP loomed large over the cricketing world, atop a double-decker, may never be his.
But I doubt that matters much to an everyday guy like Andrew Strauss. For one, his calm of manner makes him stand better on his two feet than float in fluff of clouds.
And here you go for a bored Ashes version
August 24, 2009
Please retain Ricky Ponting as captain.
Ian Chappell’s expertise is to belittle Steve Waugh: according to him, Ponting’s a better captain than Waugh. Where did that come from, sir?
Earlier Chappell claimed Mark Taylor was a better captain than Steve Waugh. Tomorrow when Michael Clarke is captain, he’ll tell us Clarke’s a better captain than Waugh.
At some point, it’s possible he called brother, Greg a better coach than Waugh. If he knew me, he’d call me a better Indian than Waugh.
Anyway, Chappell’s come to Ponting’s defence, and puts the blame squarely on the Aussie selectors. Here’s what he said -
“If Ponting clamoured for an all-seam attack at The Oval the selectors should have been strong enough and wise enough to advise otherwise.”
Appears the Aussies have learnt little from the series defeats to India, South Africa and now England. Voices like Chappell’s are defiant in their defence for Ponting as skipper.
Sure, retain Ponting as captain. You lost it a long time back. Now here’s to losing it many more times.
Earlier Chappell claimed Mark Taylor was a better captain than Steve Waugh. Tomorrow when Michael Clarke is captain, he’ll tell us Clarke’s a better captain than Waugh.
At some point, it’s possible he called brother, Greg a better coach than Waugh. If he knew me, he’d call me a better Indian than Waugh.
Anyway, Chappell’s come to Ponting’s defence, and puts the blame squarely on the Aussie selectors. Here’s what he said -
“If Ponting clamoured for an all-seam attack at The Oval the selectors should have been strong enough and wise enough to advise otherwise.”
Appears the Aussies have learnt little from the series defeats to India, South Africa and now England. Voices like Chappell’s are defiant in their defence for Ponting as skipper.
Sure, retain Ponting as captain. You lost it a long time back. Now here’s to losing it many more times.
August 23, 2009
Come on pussy come on.
Australia can win it, so can you with a plastic bat and the umpires in your pocket. On a different train of thought, the Aussies have nothing to lose...except for the Ashes. That doesn't make sense but then neither do the Ashes. Btw that's up at Bored Cricket Crazy Indians (BCC!)
Come on Pussy Come on
The Ashes look lost and so are you
Nothing to play for except your thoughts
Where do you go, what do you do?
Come on Pussy come on
Come on Pussy Come on
The Ashes look lost and so are you
Nothing to play for except your thoughts
Where do you go, what do you do?
Come on Pussy come on
August 22, 2009
Andrew Flintoff – an occasional sense of occasion.
If the headline is gimmicky, it can be argued, but so is Freddie. He looks all earnest because he knows the importance of it.
You can bet he will look his best in his last test innings today. There will be so much purpose around him, you’d think he could broker peace in the Middle East.
Freddie Flintoff will be the man. Today, tomorrow, and if it gets to day after, which it won’t, unless it rains on everyone’s parade.
This is, as the previous test, another abridged one, that should suit Freddie just fine – he is a limited overs player. But that is not the thrust of this piece or Freddie’s world in this test.
The test has just started for Freddie. He has connected to the sense of a moment. The moment was manufactured by Stuart Broad, the Aussies and whoever else could pitch in.
But we are on the threshold of a London Moment. It will be bigger than Lord’s, it will be bigger than the Oval. It will be the shape of Freddie’s fancy.
What picture will he paint? Will he be airbrushed?
Here’s what I expect, Freddie to arrive at the crease, and regardless of whether he scores or doesn’t, the crowds will be at his command. That will be a moment.
If he plunders with the bat, then it will be a savage, almost apocalyptic moment – and Noah will fetch one of Andrew Flintoff for his ark.
But it will be ball in hand that Freddie will emerge Godlike, a larger manifestation for all mortals to see, believe in, myth will be no myth no more.
As Krishna revealed the universe within to Arjun.
Freddie will seize the moment, the day, the night, and all that lies within its grasp, and beyond it.
The ball will cease to be a ball.
It will be, a moment hurled at the Australians.
And not even the Aussies can defy destiny.
It is written here, but only Freddie knows how it will pan out.
Not from the poms or the convicts, read about the Ashes @ Bored Cricket Crazy Indians (BCC!)
You can bet he will look his best in his last test innings today. There will be so much purpose around him, you’d think he could broker peace in the Middle East.
Freddie Flintoff will be the man. Today, tomorrow, and if it gets to day after, which it won’t, unless it rains on everyone’s parade.
This is, as the previous test, another abridged one, that should suit Freddie just fine – he is a limited overs player. But that is not the thrust of this piece or Freddie’s world in this test.
The test has just started for Freddie. He has connected to the sense of a moment. The moment was manufactured by Stuart Broad, the Aussies and whoever else could pitch in.
But we are on the threshold of a London Moment. It will be bigger than Lord’s, it will be bigger than the Oval. It will be the shape of Freddie’s fancy.
What picture will he paint? Will he be airbrushed?
Here’s what I expect, Freddie to arrive at the crease, and regardless of whether he scores or doesn’t, the crowds will be at his command. That will be a moment.
If he plunders with the bat, then it will be a savage, almost apocalyptic moment – and Noah will fetch one of Andrew Flintoff for his ark.
But it will be ball in hand that Freddie will emerge Godlike, a larger manifestation for all mortals to see, believe in, myth will be no myth no more.
As Krishna revealed the universe within to Arjun.
Freddie will seize the moment, the day, the night, and all that lies within its grasp, and beyond it.
The ball will cease to be a ball.
It will be, a moment hurled at the Australians.
And not even the Aussies can defy destiny.
It is written here, but only Freddie knows how it will pan out.
Not from the poms or the convicts, read about the Ashes @ Bored Cricket Crazy Indians (BCC!)
August 20, 2009
It’s not as if Sachin Tendulkar has threatened to move from Mumbai
It’s only Virender Sehwag, and it’s only from Delhi.
For a moment, let’s assume Sachin Tendulkar decides to move from Mumbai to another team.
Sounds improbable, but let’s stay with the assumption: What do you think will happen?
Mumbai will stop. Best buses will stop, so will the trains, so will the sea. There will be one focus: Sachin must stay.
Sachin cannot, and will not move from Mumbai. Bombay can move to Mumbai, but Sachin cannot move from Mumbai.
And here we are in chalta hai Dilli. Sure, the media is backing Sehwag, but why do we Delhiwallahs generally go with the flow – one of the common reactions - badiya, at least he stays with the Delhi Daredevils. And anyway, how much does he play for Delhi state – 1-2 games a year?
Sehwag may not have Sachin’s stature as a sportsperson, but he is the cricketing face of Delhi, that is if Delhi believes it has a cricketing face.
He is the Jatman. He is Oye Lucky! He is the Sunny! He is the Bubloo. He is the kid from the obscure neighbourhood who made it. Better still, he is the kid from the outskirts. He is the big dream of a little kid from a small town in a big city. In him, is the eternal Bollywood dream, make it big from nowhere. He did, from Najafgarh.
He has almost always deserved more than he got, more runs, more respect, more backing.
If you find him too simple, too straight, then maybe it’s because you are too crooked, too conniving.
Embrace the man, embrace the Jatman. He’s the best we got. He is our cricket. He is Dilli.
Try and play back the most dazzling Indian innings in the last decade – chances are, most of them starred Viru. He was, and has been India’s Tendulkar for a long time.
We knew it, yet we refused to believe it.
Truth is, Sachin moved from Mumbai a long time back. He moved to Delhi.
Look back: the evidence was always there, the uppercuts, the small frame, the flicks. We were in the 2000s with Viru, and it was like we were in the 90s with Tendu. And for a brief while, they batted together.
It could have been just half a dozen overs on March 1st, 2003 – but it was against Pakistan in the World Cup – which is where the powers of the Indian cricketing universe were so totally aligned they brought the South African heavens down.
Remember, where were you? How high did you go with the upper cuts?
So, till the next Sachin or Sehwag arrives, there is no reason for either of them to go anywhere.
Stay Jatman. Fight them. Beat them. You are better than them.
Do not retire hurt this time.
Picture from Bored Cricket Crazy Indians, where you go for a lethal dose of Jatman
August 18, 2009
August 16, 2009
Has Rahul Dravid returned for Sachin Tendulkar?
Sachin intends to play the 2011 World Cup. He will, in spite of form or fitness. He will, because that is his destiny, it has been written by him, endorsed by the BCCI.
Part of that vision is Sachin lifting the World Cup together with MS Dhoni, Yuvraj Singh, Harbhajan Singh and Rahul Dravid.
Each one of these players is key to Sachin’s plans. While MS is captain, and should still be in 2011,Yuvi and Bhajji are Sachin’s core group. They are his comfort zone. Together they are the collective face of Indian cricket.
Then what about Rahul Dravid? Dravid is a strong reminder that the 90’s master class is far superior to today’s flash of youth. He’s a flashback to both his and Sachin’s glory days. His return, more than even Sachin’s, states unequivocally that the young guns are not a patch on the fab four.
It does not matter how many of the fab four remain, what matters is the latest battle between then and now has been won yet again by India’s fab four.
The resting of the so-called next Sachin Tendulkar, Rohit Sharma is a case in point. Rohit, the brightest of the next generation swagger has fallen. Raina, Yusuf, Karthik are not indicative of now as Rohit is.
Just as Dravid and Sachin are indicative of then. Look back beyond Sharma’s scattered scoring, look at his scattered positions in the batting order. Was this all meant to be?
Yet again, Sachin and Rahul will take the field in blue together. How well it wears on him is not important, that he has returned is what’s crucial. More so to co-author Sachin Tendulkar’s legacy.
Here's another take on Rahul Dravid at Bored Cricket Crazy Indians: Living in the past?
Part of that vision is Sachin lifting the World Cup together with MS Dhoni, Yuvraj Singh, Harbhajan Singh and Rahul Dravid.
Each one of these players is key to Sachin’s plans. While MS is captain, and should still be in 2011,Yuvi and Bhajji are Sachin’s core group. They are his comfort zone. Together they are the collective face of Indian cricket.
Then what about Rahul Dravid? Dravid is a strong reminder that the 90’s master class is far superior to today’s flash of youth. He’s a flashback to both his and Sachin’s glory days. His return, more than even Sachin’s, states unequivocally that the young guns are not a patch on the fab four.
It does not matter how many of the fab four remain, what matters is the latest battle between then and now has been won yet again by India’s fab four.
The resting of the so-called next Sachin Tendulkar, Rohit Sharma is a case in point. Rohit, the brightest of the next generation swagger has fallen. Raina, Yusuf, Karthik are not indicative of now as Rohit is.
Just as Dravid and Sachin are indicative of then. Look back beyond Sharma’s scattered scoring, look at his scattered positions in the batting order. Was this all meant to be?
Yet again, Sachin and Rahul will take the field in blue together. How well it wears on him is not important, that he has returned is what’s crucial. More so to co-author Sachin Tendulkar’s legacy.
Here's another take on Rahul Dravid at Bored Cricket Crazy Indians: Living in the past?
August 13, 2009
The feeling.
I grab at the virgin white vest, that should do nicely for Bored Cricket Crazy Indians’ first Bored Day.
It’s weird, but it does feel like a person’s birthday. It could even be mine. I think it is mine. It’s tough to compare the exact feeling, for it’s been 10 months since my birthday. It’s been one year since Bored was born.
Last night I thought Bored came to be at 12.05 AM. That gave me 7 more minutes to repost the first post.
It was a little post, but I think that was, and is what Bored Cricket Crazy Indians is to me.
It asks, what is cricket to you? And if cricket is to you what it is to you, and you say it, and know it, and love it with enough honesty, there can be some crazy fucking beauty to it.
It can be one of the last scenes from American Beauty, where you are Kevin Spacey, and you’re shot dead, but you die with a smile. You die knowing you loved cricket, and you’re alright.
Only here it’s an Indian beauty. And that is why I've always said, the only grammar at BCC! is Cricket. Teri Maa Ki!
And that gets better, when you have Q from Pakistan, and Damith from Sri Lanka. And you realise, this is the subcontinent, this is our cricket. Cricket with a tadka.
But then you can get greedy, and you want the whole world to write here. To wake up not knowing who's written what about where and when.
Maybe you will too. I want your thoughts, your words.
And that Bored Anthem keeps ringing in my head, most of the time.
And then I’m logging in, and what do I write, Bored Day…instead of Bored Cricket…
It’s a rush. Man, it’s our Happy Bored Day.
Click here to get into our Bored Day Party!
It’s weird, but it does feel like a person’s birthday. It could even be mine. I think it is mine. It’s tough to compare the exact feeling, for it’s been 10 months since my birthday. It’s been one year since Bored was born.
Last night I thought Bored came to be at 12.05 AM. That gave me 7 more minutes to repost the first post.
It was a little post, but I think that was, and is what Bored Cricket Crazy Indians is to me.
It asks, what is cricket to you? And if cricket is to you what it is to you, and you say it, and know it, and love it with enough honesty, there can be some crazy fucking beauty to it.
It can be one of the last scenes from American Beauty, where you are Kevin Spacey, and you’re shot dead, but you die with a smile. You die knowing you loved cricket, and you’re alright.
Only here it’s an Indian beauty. And that is why I've always said, the only grammar at BCC! is Cricket. Teri Maa Ki!
And that gets better, when you have Q from Pakistan, and Damith from Sri Lanka. And you realise, this is the subcontinent, this is our cricket. Cricket with a tadka.
But then you can get greedy, and you want the whole world to write here. To wake up not knowing who's written what about where and when.
Maybe you will too. I want your thoughts, your words.
And that Bored Anthem keeps ringing in my head, most of the time.
And then I’m logging in, and what do I write, Bored Day…instead of Bored Cricket…
It’s a rush. Man, it’s our Happy Bored Day.
Click here to get into our Bored Day Party!
Boom Boom Big Daddy Afridi!
Right now, even if Afridi wanted to, he cannot stop himself. He is part of some greater force that has taken hold of him. If there is one English word he knows, it is AGGRESSION. If he had a speech blurb next to him, it would read as “AGGRESSION” - all caps, in italics, for there’s that nonchalant stylised way when he says it. If he sang a song it would be 'I’m too Sexy for my cricket.'
Look at the way he treats players, younger, older, even retired players – did you see him pat that old war horse ex ICL masterji Naved ul Hasan, like a baby patted on his head, “Mamma’s gonna keep baby cozy and warm…”
The youngsters got their share of lovin’ too – but frankly the only part of the match I had any interest in was the post-match chat with BOOM BOOM. He didn’t disappoint. Had the chat gone on longer he would have spanked Rameez Raja– the winks were missing, but the slap on the back was there.
And Afridi talked aggression, how he told his boys, I am aggressive captain, you be aggressive too. That is simple. That is T20. Push, shove, bully, damn it, you gotta intimidate.
And when after a wicket, a camera pans right up his raised arm to that raised finger, you can almost expect a bolt of lightning to strike through. SFX: BOOM BOOM!
Question is, how long will it take Pakistani cricket to make Afridi the all powerful cricketing General. Another bloodless coup.
And we all know how ready Youis can be to abdicate, just the slightest murmur and he’ll be gone.
This was written last night, when the net was willing but the blogger was weak. Today it's not Afridi's day, today, it is Happy Bored Day!
Look at the way he treats players, younger, older, even retired players – did you see him pat that old war horse ex ICL masterji Naved ul Hasan, like a baby patted on his head, “Mamma’s gonna keep baby cozy and warm…”
The youngsters got their share of lovin’ too – but frankly the only part of the match I had any interest in was the post-match chat with BOOM BOOM. He didn’t disappoint. Had the chat gone on longer he would have spanked Rameez Raja– the winks were missing, but the slap on the back was there.
And Afridi talked aggression, how he told his boys, I am aggressive captain, you be aggressive too. That is simple. That is T20. Push, shove, bully, damn it, you gotta intimidate.
And when after a wicket, a camera pans right up his raised arm to that raised finger, you can almost expect a bolt of lightning to strike through. SFX: BOOM BOOM!
Question is, how long will it take Pakistani cricket to make Afridi the all powerful cricketing General. Another bloodless coup.
And we all know how ready Youis can be to abdicate, just the slightest murmur and he’ll be gone.
This was written last night, when the net was willing but the blogger was weak. Today it's not Afridi's day, today, it is Happy Bored Day!
August 12, 2009
What on earth did WADA have to say to BCCI
Hi Bored Friends,
WADA (World Anti Doping Agency) spoke up to us at BCC! (Bored Cricket Crazy Indians). Basically they liked what we stood for.
You can call it a first, exclusive, and all that filthy hard sell stuff the media hurls at us.
Here you go, WADA's Director of Communications, Julie Masse gives BCC!s Bored Member, RajaB the dope on testing.
yawns,
naked cricket,
(bored member)
PS: Pls spread this dope around
WADA (World Anti Doping Agency) spoke up to us at BCC! (Bored Cricket Crazy Indians). Basically they liked what we stood for.
You can call it a first, exclusive, and all that filthy hard sell stuff the media hurls at us.
Here you go, WADA's Director of Communications, Julie Masse gives BCC!s Bored Member, RajaB the dope on testing.
yawns,
naked cricket,
(bored member)
PS: Pls spread this dope around
August 11, 2009
Freddie’s farewell was Lord’s
If he bowls anymore, it’ll be a farewell to arms, and other limbs.
Mind goes back to Kumble’s last ball in test cricket; it was over-pitched, driven down the ground for four.
Flintoff, much like Kumble, will flex his face and contort you into believing he’s giving it more than 100%. Often that’s true.
It’s such a shame then that also in view is the bowling arm, not going through fully, pushing that ball down leg. And in Freddie’s case, you can’t compare the mid 80s to a 92 mph delivery, or Lord’s to the slavery of Edgbaston.
But that’s over and done with.
Flintoff will play at the Oval. He should, even on one leg. If I was king, I’d make an even half fit Freddie open the bowling.
Even if it’s just for a Shoiab spell of 2-3 overs, hit the Aussies hard, with Mr Big. After that, save Freddie for Ponting.
Restructure the batting order to accommodate Freddie higher up – he was in some batting form, use his last two innings, greedily.
Make Freddie feel like captain. What, let him feel like God. Have him play the crowds, rouse the ruffians, set loose London on the enemy.
If Lord’s was Freddie’s farewell, make the Oval his resurrection.
It’s a one-time thing. Make us believe. But before that guys, believe in yourself.
It’s London again.
Mind goes back to Kumble’s last ball in test cricket; it was over-pitched, driven down the ground for four.
Flintoff, much like Kumble, will flex his face and contort you into believing he’s giving it more than 100%. Often that’s true.
It’s such a shame then that also in view is the bowling arm, not going through fully, pushing that ball down leg. And in Freddie’s case, you can’t compare the mid 80s to a 92 mph delivery, or Lord’s to the slavery of Edgbaston.
But that’s over and done with.
Flintoff will play at the Oval. He should, even on one leg. If I was king, I’d make an even half fit Freddie open the bowling.
Even if it’s just for a Shoiab spell of 2-3 overs, hit the Aussies hard, with Mr Big. After that, save Freddie for Ponting.
Restructure the batting order to accommodate Freddie higher up – he was in some batting form, use his last two innings, greedily.
Make Freddie feel like captain. What, let him feel like God. Have him play the crowds, rouse the ruffians, set loose London on the enemy.
If Lord’s was Freddie’s farewell, make the Oval his resurrection.
It’s a one-time thing. Make us believe. But before that guys, believe in yourself.
It’s London again.
August 10, 2009
The 3 Days, 2 Nights B&B Ashes weekend getaway
That's England at Headingley for you.
They just did test cricket a huge disservice. Almost predictably, they lost it after Strauss’ wicket, not once but twice. On an Early Bored Call @ twitter after Strauss’ first innings’ wicket, this – “Australia will win the 4th Ashes test at Headingley. Looked over my shoulder, and it was 2 wickets down.
Funny bit is England was set for defeat: much before they took the field, and even before they were hurled out of bed by the fire alarm. For a side that can obsess with one player, even if he’s the only player they got, England deserved to lose.
Think they believed in their inadequacies as a team, in the Langer dossier, in basically nothing.
If this is not match fixing then what is?
England takes the field with eleven players. Amongst them are two non-players, Bopara and Harmison. Was Harmison there on Freddie’s behest, ‘eh, keep my mate, willya?’ That Harmison can still make the side is an advertisement for scrapping test cricket.
That teams continue to blunder on selection until they are thrown by a defeat shows just how safe most selection is– the whole world knows Bopara is not going to score any runs, but they still must give the kid another chance. If anything it’s a disservice to Bopara. He goes in No. 3, a lamb to the slaughter.
If England wants to win the Ashes, they first have to weed out the losers. And they don’t need the Langer dossier for that. Just a stomach for a fight.
The rest can go on holiday, but not on our expense this time.
They just did test cricket a huge disservice. Almost predictably, they lost it after Strauss’ wicket, not once but twice. On an Early Bored Call @ twitter after Strauss’ first innings’ wicket, this – “Australia will win the 4th Ashes test at Headingley. Looked over my shoulder, and it was 2 wickets down.
Funny bit is England was set for defeat: much before they took the field, and even before they were hurled out of bed by the fire alarm. For a side that can obsess with one player, even if he’s the only player they got, England deserved to lose.
Think they believed in their inadequacies as a team, in the Langer dossier, in basically nothing.
If this is not match fixing then what is?
England takes the field with eleven players. Amongst them are two non-players, Bopara and Harmison. Was Harmison there on Freddie’s behest, ‘eh, keep my mate, willya?’ That Harmison can still make the side is an advertisement for scrapping test cricket.
That teams continue to blunder on selection until they are thrown by a defeat shows just how safe most selection is– the whole world knows Bopara is not going to score any runs, but they still must give the kid another chance. If anything it’s a disservice to Bopara. He goes in No. 3, a lamb to the slaughter.
If England wants to win the Ashes, they first have to weed out the losers. And they don’t need the Langer dossier for that. Just a stomach for a fight.
The rest can go on holiday, but not on our expense this time.
August 08, 2009
The test cricket 'whereabouts' clause
Just as WADA has a 'whereabouts' clause, test cricket too needs one. Like ‘whereabouts’ you going with this game, England?
If they fail to answer thrice, then strike them off.
Australia win, as for us, we have nothing to lose.
If this goes on any longer, we'll need dope testing too.
And yes, it will be out of competition.
If they fail to answer thrice, then strike them off.
Australia win, as for us, we have nothing to lose.
If this goes on any longer, we'll need dope testing too.
And yes, it will be out of competition.
August 06, 2009
August 05, 2009
August 03, 2009
Black in whites.
Big black man come out and play
Big black man come out and say
"I rule the world of cricket
Every which way I do"
Big black man where are you?
Where have gone the conquests
Your shoulders stoop
There is no general, there is no troop
All your armies lie wasted in some beach resort
Sipping on Pina Coladas
Does it have to come to this?
Without a goodbye, without a kiss
Oh, Mr Michael Holding, you I like
When you speak such wisdom in the Sky box
But what use is this, when your Windies cricket
Is on the rocks
And Mr Tony Cozier, you know so much
You even remember the old glory days
You were there, you are here
It is sad to hear you speak
For a team soh weak
It doesn’t have to come to this
The serpent is among us
We are the cause, we are the cure
Look deep amongst us
Look for the reggae in your soul
Look for taking cricket out of the hole
Look my brothers, look my sisters
Our sons play on the beach with blisters
They cannot afford shoes, yet they play
What is it, you have to say?
Can we not play our team?
Can we not play our half baked dream?
We may not be the greatest
But we still have a team
Can we not play our team
I want to see black in whites
I want to see black in heights
I want to
I want to
I want to see cricket survive
I want to see cricket alive
Oh, Sir Frank Warrell where have you gone?
Save us from these troubled times
For a taste of West Indies v West Indies, here you go
Big black man come out and say
"I rule the world of cricket
Every which way I do"
Big black man where are you?
Where have gone the conquests
Your shoulders stoop
There is no general, there is no troop
All your armies lie wasted in some beach resort
Sipping on Pina Coladas
Does it have to come to this?
Without a goodbye, without a kiss
Oh, Mr Michael Holding, you I like
When you speak such wisdom in the Sky box
But what use is this, when your Windies cricket
Is on the rocks
And Mr Tony Cozier, you know so much
You even remember the old glory days
You were there, you are here
It is sad to hear you speak
For a team soh weak
It doesn’t have to come to this
The serpent is among us
We are the cause, we are the cure
Look deep amongst us
Look for the reggae in your soul
Look for taking cricket out of the hole
Look my brothers, look my sisters
Our sons play on the beach with blisters
They cannot afford shoes, yet they play
What is it, you have to say?
Can we not play our team?
Can we not play our half baked dream?
We may not be the greatest
But we still have a team
Can we not play our team
I want to see black in whites
I want to see black in heights
I want to
I want to
I want to see cricket survive
I want to see cricket alive
Oh, Sir Frank Warrell where have you gone?
Save us from these troubled times
For a taste of West Indies v West Indies, here you go
August 02, 2009
An Anonymous Tournament.
I have a problem with The Emerging Players tournament. Basically the name, it stinks. What no sponsors? Why could they not rope in an Emerging Company. The new Cola on the block, Karma Cola or something. Then we’d know, right, must we spell it out?
By the same token, test matches could be called the Old Farts’ Fix or Record Hunters’ Graveyard or NGO Cricket. But no, we call it Test Cricket, and there’s edge to it. Enough edge to see it keel over, kill itself, with a little help from friends.
One Day Internationals, that name sucks. ODIs too, one-dayers, I really can’t say – it’s tough to fake it with ODIs. With Day/Night cricket, think they should just call it One-Night stand, and play the last one-dayer, pack up and leave.
Twenty20 has it, the name repeats itself, and the IPL takes its cue from there – the mixed trauma and joy of watching the first season, day-in, day-out, and then the 2nd season, and then the T20 World Cup, and then Pakistan play T20s in One-day games too – what just today they scored a perfectly respectable T20 score, 160 something. Did so in the test series too, that’s how addictive Twenty20 is – they’re not the World Champions for nothing.
Another thing, while all teams have ‘Emerging’ in their team name (India Emerging Players etc), the Aussie team is called the Australian Institute of Sports. Are they nuts, why play cricketers from an Institute?
They lost it badly the other day, 44 all out! While Emerging Chokers South Africa scored 227; won all their games, and then lost it in the finals.
Turned out to be the Submerging Players Tournament for them. Ok, bad one, but then the name asked for it.
Also, did you know India won the EPT?
By the same token, test matches could be called the Old Farts’ Fix or Record Hunters’ Graveyard or NGO Cricket. But no, we call it Test Cricket, and there’s edge to it. Enough edge to see it keel over, kill itself, with a little help from friends.
One Day Internationals, that name sucks. ODIs too, one-dayers, I really can’t say – it’s tough to fake it with ODIs. With Day/Night cricket, think they should just call it One-Night stand, and play the last one-dayer, pack up and leave.
Twenty20 has it, the name repeats itself, and the IPL takes its cue from there – the mixed trauma and joy of watching the first season, day-in, day-out, and then the 2nd season, and then the T20 World Cup, and then Pakistan play T20s in One-day games too – what just today they scored a perfectly respectable T20 score, 160 something. Did so in the test series too, that’s how addictive Twenty20 is – they’re not the World Champions for nothing.
Another thing, while all teams have ‘Emerging’ in their team name (India Emerging Players etc), the Aussie team is called the Australian Institute of Sports. Are they nuts, why play cricketers from an Institute?
They lost it badly the other day, 44 all out! While Emerging Chokers South Africa scored 227; won all their games, and then lost it in the finals.
Turned out to be the Submerging Players Tournament for them. Ok, bad one, but then the name asked for it.
Also, did you know India won the EPT?
August 01, 2009
Extras more influential than Younis Khan.
Pakistan has not collapsed, they’ve just stumbled along the way. Almost like tripping yourself. How do you that – watch Pakistan bat 50 overs, 30 too many by far.
So here we are 144/9, and the Extras at 26 (b 4, lb 4, w 18) captaining the team. Next highest is the captain for post match communication, 23 (73).
As expected, the Strike Rate of Extras is 100 - research unavailable to prove if 2 or more leg byes were taken on a single delivery. If so, the strike rate of extras would be in excess of 100.
Compare that to poor Younis’, a princely 31.50. Misbah gone, MoYo gone, it’s only ODIs, so how long will it take Younis to go?
It’s one thing to unite a team, but what good is a united team if they still don’t score?
So here we are 144/9, and the Extras at 26 (b 4, lb 4, w 18) captaining the team. Next highest is the captain for post match communication, 23 (73).
As expected, the Strike Rate of Extras is 100 - research unavailable to prove if 2 or more leg byes were taken on a single delivery. If so, the strike rate of extras would be in excess of 100.
Compare that to poor Younis’, a princely 31.50. Misbah gone, MoYo gone, it’s only ODIs, so how long will it take Younis to go?
It’s one thing to unite a team, but what good is a united team if they still don’t score?
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