If I was a ball

If you was a ball

Whose bat would you be touched by

If you was a ball

Whose bat would you be touched by

If I was a ball I’d like to stay in shape

I’d like to travel far beyond the boundary ropes

If I was a ball

I’d like to go for an on drive

I’d like fielders running after me

Like boys run after girls

I’d like them to chase me, always interested somehow

Never giving up hope

I’d like to be played off the pads

Pulled and cut and flicked

But never in anger

I may be a ball, but I got my feelings

Feelings that very few can tell

Feelings that very special few can tell

Very, very special few can tell

If I was a ball, I’d like to be touched

By VVS’ bat

He doesn’t ignore, he plays me

With his bat

The pads they’re part of his uniform

What’s with Laxman, he’s always in form

If I was a ball, If you was a ball

Whose bat would you be touched by?


on bored: vvs laxman

Revealed: What went into the Kotla pitch.

,


On Bored DDCA: Married to the mob

The Delhi Underground.

Today, 8 year old Vasu and I took our cricket rivalry to the basement. The pitch was ceramic tiled, far more even keel than the Kotla, and the lights didn’t give in like Eden. It was an advert for taking cricket indoors. And had our short duel been telecast, who knows what could have been.

Equipment was standard, tennis ball and a MSD bat. The pitch was around 25 ft; not a speck of grass. It was liberating to chuck ball after ball. I even played left handed, got caught in front like Sanath.

Our match was abandoned abruptly. It was my tea break. Vasu and I shifted to the England South Africa game; just seeing Ntini play his 101st test put me off. I asked the boy how his football was coming along? Clearly two abandoned games in one day puts your mind of cricket. Then why am I writing this?


On Bored: You son of a pitch!

Mind your Tendulkar 100 making business.

Today’s Tendulkar 100 business was funny, like the Tendulkar 20 business a few weeks ago. He’s within striking distance of a 100, in the 80s, and who do we have - Sunny and Shastri marching into the box. This is when they can’t help themselves, especially Sunny – he’s such a record player.

So what does Dinesh Karthik do, block? Earn some brownie points with Sachin and Sunny and Shastri? Never mind, nobody will remember his cameo, but what a noble gesture, putting individual above team, or is it Him above self?

By now you would have seen more than a few guys block away for the greater good of a century – and Sachin will have that cherubic grin after each block – it almost makes it worthwhile.

After all, the match was nearly won. But what is nearly – Malinga was bowling yorkers on call. And far flung as it may sound, seven wickets can fall off seven yorkers.

So what does DKNY do – he struts his stuff, six over mid on, four down fine leg, game over; Sachin 96 not out.

I’m quite happy, but what about Sunny and Shastri; and the folks, they’re upset too, why couldn’t Karthik just let Sachin score a hundred? At least you can’t blame Dravid for declaring on him.



On Bored: MSD vs. Sehwag

The highpoint.

When Mendis walks in to bat @7down, you know you have a chance in hell, and Nagpur. But I also like to watch Mendis bat; he’s another one of those zeroes’ batsmen that I follow – will he get another duck?

He’s almost on par with Yusuf Pathan when it comes to ducks, and he’s almost as flam. He doesn’t chew gum, he chews his sleeves – that’s why those little sleeves, buster.

First ball short of length he didn’t make contact, whizzed past over the stumps; then another one, that zipped past outside off, naturally he didn’t touch it.

There was one delivery that danced in his pads, and allowed him the luxury of a leg bye. But now I see that Mendis actually made 2 runs of 4 deliveries.

Strikes me that I’ve edited Mendis’ 2 runs. How judgemental of me.


On Bored: India Lanka

Voices.

I jump out of the shower

Siva’s given Mahela out

Nearly back home from lunch

OUT! Some stray voice goes

The other Jayawardene’s gone


The sounds of cricket

The voices in my head.

Sehwag’s mouth to mouth for test cricket.

Take it you saw Sehwag’s innings today, if you didn’t, you will – in the future, it is the future. It just did a mouth-to-mouth for test cricket, how else will you watch him bat for six hours?

Spare a thought for Rahul Dravid, he was there, as he often is. Living his second cricket childhood, when last did you see him box, pat, hug, laugh, grin – always felt, there’s something special when these two bat together; if it’s not a world record threatening 400 something opening partnership, it’s the encouragement you give a friend, an ally, a believer.

Sehwag and Dravid have all that, and some unspoken code of respect and trust. There is a calm that descends upon the two when they partner each other.

My mind goes back to the World Cup 2007 game against Bermuda, captain, Dravid’s ‘stay there’ gesture to Viru.

Today they stayed there. And even though Viru scored all those runs, I’d like to believe, a friend’s gentle nudge goes a long way. It can be lonely when you’re two against eleven.

On Bored: Jatman Sehwag

How long does it take to Freesanth Sreeesanth

If I was King, Sreesanth would have played the first test at Motera. But allocation of India caps don’t work that way. Ishant Sharma had to play that first test, so we could be doubly sure he’s running on empty. In a way, Sree lucked out by not playing that first test, but who knows, maybe he would have breathed life into Motera too.

I can’t help thinking what Ishnat would’ve done in Kanpur, or for that matter, what has Zaheer done? Is Zaheer even 90%?

My mind goes back to the last test series in Australia, how many games did it take for India to play Sehwag? How many games will it take for India to not play Bhajji?

Why are we calling the best eleven sitting in front of TVs, when people paid to, refuse to see the light.


Sreesanth was born again as Freesanth at Bored Cricket Crazy Indians. Not today after his five for, but when the world thought he was dead.

After five painful days of the Motera test, a new form of abuse:

On Bored: More graphic humour